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· May 20, 2024
· 71
Harrison Butker Late For Practice Again After Spending Morning Enslaving Women And Forcing Them To Wear Handmaid's Tale Uniforms
KANSAS CITY, MO - Tensions between Kansas City Chiefs kicker Harrison Butker and his teammates escalated this morning after he showed up late for prac...
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· May 20, 2024
· 89
Mike Tyson Upset To Discover Jake Paul Fight Contract Includes 'No Punching Jake Paul' Clause
LAS VEGAS, NV - As he continued to train intensely for his upcoming bout with the YouTuber, boxing legend Mike Tyson was upset to discover his contrac...
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After Michael Cohen Testimony, Trump Trial Prosecutors File Motion For A Do-Over
U.S. · May 17, 2024
· 134
Congressmen Build Special Soundproof Girl Congress Next Door So The Men Can Get Some Work Done
U.S. · May 17, 2024
· 152
Crowd Cheers As Scottie Scheffler Tunnels Out Of Prison Right Onto Tee Box
Sports · May 17, 2024
· 82
Support For 19th Amendment Decreases Sharply
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Dad Tears Up A Little As Son Shouts 'I Have The High Ground!' During Lightsaber Duel
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· May 19, 2024
· 185
God Baffled That Democrats Managed To Ruin California
HEAVEN - According to sources in the celestial realm, God is scratching His head in wonderment that Democrats somehow managed to mess up California.
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· May 20, 2024
· 104
Catholic Church Distances Self From Pope Francis
WORLD - After a series of shocking unbiblical statements from the Supreme Pontiff, the Catholic Church officially distanced itself from Pope Francis.
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· May 18, 2024
· 317
10 Real-Life Examples Of Why American Measurements Are Better Than The Communist Metric System
Should we measure things in inches or centimeters? Pounds or kilograms? Miles or whatever it is they use in Europe? The answer is clear: we should use...
Life
· May 19, 2024
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Husband Puzzled By Strange Device Found Near Bread Loaf
LANCASTER, PA - According to sources, local husband Max Brosa was confused after finding a small, mysterious plastic device near an open package of br...
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· May 16, 2024
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Donald Trump's 7 Debate Demands Revealed
Details were still being ironed out, but it was confirmed yesterday that the world could now look forward to another debate between Donald Trump and J...
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· May 15, 2024
· 145
Here Are Biden's 10 Conditions For Debating Trump
Biden's team announced the President has agreed to a debate with Donald Trump in June, but only if a lengthy set of very particular conditions are met...
Sports
· May 16, 2024
· 129
'Harrison Butker Does Not Reflect Our Values,' Says League Of Woman Beaters
NEW YORK, NY - In response to an angry outcry from feminists regarding statements he made in a commencement speech, the NFL issued a statement that Ka...
Entertainment
· May 16, 2024
· 102
Sports Illustrated Goes Bankrupt Trying To Provide Enough Catering For Cover Model Shoot
U.S. - Sports Illustrated has declared bankruptcy after trying to provide enough catering for their latest plus-size model photo shoot. Sources say th...
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